Hi guys! The SMT here...
In addition to Kim & Paul's little curlers, we need some extra thoughts & prayers. This morning, shortly I left, they got terrible news - Kim's father (Dad B) has had a very serious medicial emergency. He is in the hospital, sedated and awaiting surgery (likely not for a few days), with swelling at his brain stem and an unclear diagnosis regarding how long he was without oxygen. Needless to say, everyone is scared, and we NEED Dad B to be around to greet his grandbabies.
Because of the pain and stress this is causing Kim, as well as the timing (um, babies are supposed to be transfered tomorrow) and distance (Dad B lives in Michigan, not A Short Drive), Kim & Paul would like your thoughts on what to do next... Should they freeze everything until a time when Kim's body might be more relaxed? Just how much impact will the additional stress have on this process, which they have worked and prayed and suffered so much for up to this point?
Kim & Paul are tough as brass balls, and their curlers are too... Please send all the extra positive, healing energy you have to Dad B, so these three generations of survivors can have one hell of a happy reunion.
*******Updated******
It appears the swelling in the brain stem has gone down, and he's been responding to commands to move things. He's even able to open his eyes a little. He's still not out of the woods, but things are looking much better than a few hours ago. Dad apparently passed out from the pain from a ruptured bowel, which left him breathing but not getting enough oxygen. They do not how long he went without significant oxygen. The latest not-so-good news is that while his brain looked good, they've now seen a spot on his colon, which they are worried about. Since the brain swelling is going down, it looks like they will take him for surgery when they think he is strong enough for it.
I think we're going to do the transfer tomorrow. Everything in my body says to get my babies and go be with my dad. The RE emailed me back and said that significant stress could be problematic, and he advised us to think about freezing. My gut says I need to take these babies with me, so I think I'm going to listen. If we have some drastic change in emby news tomorrow, we will rethink, but right now, it's on.
Their mama is a fighter (and their dad), and so is their grampa. They are going to come with us and listen to me love my dad and help him be strong. I will be telling our babies the same. They will feel all of my love and all of our B family strength. The whole family is gathered around my dad. Our babies should be there, too.
My dad is a twin. I've been praying and hoping for twins for him, so they could "skip a generation" like we always thought they would. I can't have twins without my dad.
21 February 2010
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I'm so sorry to hear about Kim's dad - my thoughts and prayers are with him and the whole family.
ReplyDeleteAs for what to do, it's a very difficult decision. All I can say is what I would likely do, which is to go for an FET later, if that is still possible. Being able to transfer when Kim can stay put for a few days and get lots of rest is best.
But if it is not possible or it just doesn't feel right to put it off, then I firmly believe it is meant to happen now, and I am sure Kim and Paul will manage to find a way to be there for her dad and take care of their precious cargo.
Thinking of you both,
Maddy
Oh Kim, I am so sorry to hear about your dad. I'll keep him and your family in my thoughts and prayers. I know what it's like to be so far from family at a time like this.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure what to tell as far as transferring or not. Does your clinic vitrify? If so, the thaw rate will be over 95% and the success rate of the FET will probably be that of a fresh transfer. For what it is worth I asked my RE about stress during an IVF cycle and he said that stress doesn't play a role in the outcome, that it can cause ovulation delay during a natural cycle, but during an IVF cycle it plays no role. I've done a fresh and frozen cycle, and the frozen cycle is soooo much easier than a fresh cycle. So much easier. That said, you and your husband should do whatever feels right to you and whatever causes you the least amount of stress--if that is possible.
Take care. I'll be thinking about you.
Wow, I will be praying for all of you- mama, daddy, curlers, and grandpa!
ReplyDeleteSafe transfer & travels to you, & a speedy and whole recovery to your father.
ReplyDeletekeeping you in my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteyou need to do what you feel is right for you and your babies.
ILCW
Go with your gut. Lots of positive thoughts headed to your family right now.
ReplyDeleteICLW
My God, your poor dad! My heart just absolutely sunk reading this news. I can't even imagine the fear your family is experiencing right now. It's just absolutely tragic and unfair. I will be praying for your dad's recovery and also praying that you make it through these next few days. Coupling a transfer with a family crisis is intense. If it turns out that you and/or your RE make the decision to freeze all and transfer at a later date, I would not let that get you down. Although you'd have to wait a little longer to be reunited with your babies, vitrification is very safe and has a very successful thaw rate.
ReplyDeleteStill, like the others have said, do what you feel is right for you and your little ones right now. HUGE hugs to you.
know my response is a little late, but thinking of everyone involved and hoping for the best.
ReplyDelete